Good afternoon, my sweet one
by Loveedith
Summary: AU for 3:3. Edith reaches out for Anthony before the wedding, so he never utters those words.
1. The wedding

Edith was overflowing with happiness when she at last was standing by Anthony's side in church. She had difficulties holding her voice steady when she looked up and whispered to him.

"Good afternoon".

"Good afternoon, my sweet one", he replied. But she sensed at once that something was wrong with him. He was worried, she was afraid his old worries about not being good enough for her had come back yet again. She would show him tonight how very good he was for her, but she felt he needed some reassurance right now.

So she reached out and squeezed his left hand, while looking up into his worried eyes.

"I love you so very much, Anthony", she said, in a voice that was no longer a whisper but loud enough for her Papa and everyone else around them to hear. "You make me so happy!" That seemed to calm Anthony down a little, and he gave her a little shy smile.

Then the reverend started: "Dearly beloved."

...

They had both managed to say the right things at the right times during the ceremony, and now they were pronounced husband and wife. When he bowed down to kiss her she noticed that his worries seemed to have disappeared. He seemed much more sure of himself than he had ever been in all these last months.

Edith was brimming over with happiness. It was obvious that being married to her agreed with him. Maybe it was just the fact that he couldn't change his mind any longer that had eased up his mind.

...

They spent their wedding night back at his house - their house - before they started out on their honeymoon the next day. They were a little shy that night, this was after all her first experience of the physical side of marriage and his experience was so long in the past. But they managed to get done what should be done before the morning came. Edith had thought it would be lovely, but she was quite surprised about how wonderful it all was. He was such a gentle and careful lover.

And she loved him so very, very much.

...

A/N: I needed to give them a happy ending.


	2. The baby

They were in their bed, many months later. Anthony had his good hand on Edith's belly, feeling their child kicking softly against his palm. Through his happiness, he felt a sting of bad conscience. There was something he had to tell her, he just couldn't delay it any longer.

"Edith darling, I almost killed this little one", he said as a way to begin. "I am so sorry!"

"No, no you didn't!" Edith protested. "We were only making love. Don't worry! It has it's own little compartment to live in, you didn't hurt it at all!"

She had a very sweet way to put that, and it made him smile. How much he loved her! But he still felt the urge to tell her his dreadful secret.

"Yes, my sweet, I know those biological facts. But I wasn't thinking about just now," he explained. "I was thinking about our wedding. I almost killed this little one on our wedding day."

"But, I don't understand... on our wedding day... We hadn't even made love... This little one didn't even exist..."

"Well, my dearest, maybe not exactly killed it, but it would have had the same effect. I was very, very close from hindering it ever to be conceived. Because I didn't think of this little one then, I only thought of you. What would be best for you."

"What are you talking about? I don't understand."

"My dearest darling, I was very close to leave you there, at the altar. Actually, the only thing that stopped me was that you reached out for me and told me you loved me, just before the reverend began. After you did that, I felt maybe I might really deserve you, I might have the right to have you. Without that, I was quite determined to give you up, right there. To keep you from throwing away your life. I had made up my mind to do that, and I'm so sorry about it all, my darling Edith. But I think you have the right to know what a horrible person I am."

"What! Surely you must be joking. Please Anthony, don't say such dreadful things, it's not funny at all!"

"No, my sweetest, I'm not joking, I'm very serious. I feel very much ashamed of all this now, but I think you have the right to know about it. I thought I wasn't worthy of you, that I had no right to marry you and let you waste your life on me. So I wanted to do what was good for you, in the long run."

She was horrified. She brushed away his hand from her belly, and rolled over to the far side of the bed. When she sat up he saw her shoulders heaving, as if she was crying or trying very hard not to cry.

"How could you think leaving me at the altar would be good for me!" she cried out. "How very stupid you are! And I always thought you were such an intelligent man!"

She was so angry she got out of bed, rushed into the dressing-room, slammed the door, and for the first time during their marriage she went through to the room that was supposed to be her own bedroom and lay down in that cold bed, shaking with rage and sorrow. Had he really planned to do that, it was so unbelievable.

She wished he would come after her, beg her to come back, but she knew he wouldn't. That was not his way of arguing. In fact he didn't like arguing at all, and usually that was one of the things she loved him for, she had had too much arguing in her life. When he thought he had been wrong, he would come to her and apologise, but when he thought he was right, he just waited for her to think it through, and see his point. And now she was sure he thought he had been right in telling her those dreadful things, because he thought she had the right to know.

So he would give her the chance to think it over. He would worry because she had been so angry, and he would be waiting for her to come back. He wouldn't be able to sleep, but he wouldn't come after her either.

She was so scared, even more scared than angry. What if he really had left her there that day? What would have happened?

No wedding night - that wonderful feeling of being with him at last, to have him as her husband, to be his wife. Feeling his naked body so close to her own. At last getting to know what those wonderful things were really all about. That deep and final intimacy. The fulfilment. She had loved him so much before they were married, and after their wedding night she loved him even more. She just couldn't stop touching him, she couldn't keep her hands off him.

No honeymoon - travelling with him, getting to see all those wonderful places and all those wonderful things during the days. The paintings and sculptures, the operas and concerts, all those old buildings and sights she had only read about in books. So much to see and so much to talk about! And making love almost every night, in all those different hotel rooms. Each night they were getting a little more confident and less shy, each time they made love they were getting a little more bold and playful, each night their love-making was getting even better than the night before.

No living together - waking up beside him, discussing the latest news while reading the newspapers at the breakfast table. A long walk every day, holding hands and talking about the past and the future, planning and living their lives together. Sometimes visits to friends and relatives in the afternoons and evenings, but mostly just the two of them talking and laughing or reading together in silence in the library. Going to concerts and to the theatre. Sometimes a dinner party at their own home, but mostly it was just him and her having dinner together, no need to dress up. And sleeping close to him every night in bed, never feeling lonely again, not on the nights they made love, not on the nights they didn't.

No running the estate together - he had taught her everything about that and he discussed most daily management and all new improvements with her. And he had told her quite clearly that this was their estate now, not only his, she was as responsible of keeping it in order as he was. He knew he was so much older, she had to know how to manage everything if he would die or become too ill to take care of it himself. So she had to learn, but she had a real interest in agriculture and mechanisation as well, though her father never listened to her opinions about things like that. But Anthony did, he really thought her opinions valuable. This interest in agriculture and mechanisation was one of the many things she and Anthony had in common.

No little baby in her belly - how happy she had been when she told him she thought she was expecting, that she was going to see the doctor. How happy Anthony had been to hear that. And how happy they both were when the doctor had confirmed it. And she realised that living with him during all those months, being noticed, being listened to, being cared about, being admired and being loved, had made her a much better and happier person. She really thought she would be able to be a very good mother now, and she also knew that this little one would have the most wonderful father in the whole world.

But if he had left her there, she would have had none of all this. Was there anything more pathetic than a bride left at the altar? And her dearest dear Anthony had planned to do that to her! Was it to be believed?

As she lay there thinking it all through, longing to be back in his warm embrace, her anger started to evaporate. She felt her child moving. She knew that there were reasons why this child in her belly was his child and no other man's. Because she knew who he was, she knew why she loved him so much. She knew all his sweetness and goodnatured-ness, and she knew how very much he loved her. So there was only one conclusion to reach about his strange confession, and she wished she had seen that all at once.

How could he think he didn't deserve her, when it really was she that should worry about not deserving him.

"Let's get back to your Papa!", she whispered to the little one. She started to get up from that cold bed, noticing for the first time that she was totally naked after their love-making. She had obviously left their bed and their room, and got into this bed without even thinking about her nudity. No wonder she was cold! She thought of wrapping a blanket around herself, but decided not to. The blanket would also be cold, what she needed was to get back into his warmth. So she just sat up in bed, put her naked feet down on the cold floor and walked quickly back into the dressing-room.

She only hesitated a few seconds before she opened the door to their bedroom. He looked up at her when she entered the room, and saw in her face that she wasn't angry with him any longer. He took in her nakedness, her full breasts made bigger by the pregnancy, and the protruding belly on her slim body that made her look so very vulnerable. God, she was beautiful! How could he ever have thought he deserved her?

"Please Anthony, I think you should stop worry about what you told me before", she started.

"Come in here to me, my darling! You must be freezing", he interrupted her, holding up the duvet with his left arm, were he was lying in bed on his right side. She obeyed, lay down on the bed with her back to him and slowly inched herself backwards towards him until he had her against his naked chest. He felt so very warm and comfortable to her. She knew she must feel very cold to him, but he didn't move away from her, only pressed her closer to him, trying to warm her up.

She put his hand back onto her belly where their child was moving again. So he knew he was forgiven.

Deserving her or not, he had her now. And that little one in her belly had every right to exist. So all he could do now was to try to take care of them and protect them, both of them. To see to it that the estate was well kept, and that Edith could take care of it without him. And let the two of them know every day of his life how much he loved them. How much he loved Edith, how much he loved that little one, their little child.

His thoughts were interrupted when she started talking again.

"My dear Anthony, I know there is no way you could have left me at the altar", she said. "I am quite sure of it, whatever you may think yourself. You may have thought about leaving me there, but you could never have done it. Never ever! Never in a thousand years! You are much too sweet a man to do something like that."

After a moments thought, she added: "You simply don't have it in you."

...

A/N:

I will let Edith have the last word in my last (?) story, because I totally agree with her.

...

This is especially for you, MimiK, I have wanted to give you an Edith/Anthony happy ending for some time, as a thank you for all encouragement and for your dedicating To Cope With to me. Please finish Lady Of The House, I promise to read it!

And to everyone else, please read MimiK's Edith/Anthony stories if you haven't done so already, they are lovely!

...

Thank you Julian Fellowes for making up those two wonderful characters! (Although I still find Anthony's jilting Edith very much out of character, however lovingly he did it.)

And thank you Laura Carmichael and Robert Bathurst for playing the two of them and their relationship so adorably!

...

I wish everyone who has ever read or reviewed any of my stories a long life and plenty of happiness!


End file.
